This is it.

Is this it? Can it be?

Is there something more?

But, no, this is it:

That last moment to breathe.

This is it, there is no time to spare.

Can this be it?

But it must be.

Can you see?

Can you dare to breathe?

The light is fading to dark.

There is no white or black.

Everything is fading to grey.

Dark, light—but there is no difference anymore.

It’s all grey.

There is no distinction.

There is no you or I.

There is not even an “us.”

This is it, the glob that remains.

Can’t you feel it?

Because you don’t matter anymore;

I don’t matter anymore.

We never did; we never were.

Can’t you see?

There never was a you or an I.

There never could be.

Fun, Fun, Fun

A great deal of excitement has occurred since my last post, so I'll give the overview:

My best friend got me Still Got Legs and The World Is Mine (I Don't Know Anything) as well as a sonic screwdriver for my graduation party. She also wrapped them in post-its with lyrics from Hank Green songs on them. How awesome is that?

I'm also teaching this friend to swim--and there has been mild success! She can now do the elementary backstroke. And we got a kick board to make the future easier.

My sister and I saw Deathly Hallows Part Two. I was in love before, but I am even more so now. (Although, I would have preferred to kill Ron off rather than Fred. And I hope they realize that Harry has no wand now, because he didn't fix it like he did in the book. He is vulnerable.)

I went shopping. I got capris. I have been less disgustingly warm since. And I haven't burned yet this summer! (Granted, I use three different sun screens, and one of them is 70+ and leaves me white as a geisha.)

I've also been to a mess of grad. parties for people I love very much. And I got one of them a sexist gift, because she's female and belongs in the kitchen. (Way too excited about that.)

But today was inarguably the best day I've had this summer. A group of friends and I went up to a park where shenanigans took place. Once there, I had to bike off to pick up a friend. (Well, when I say pick up, I mean bike to her house and then walk her to the park because she wasn't permitted to do it on her own.) But I shan't complain, because my best friend asked me to do so. That, and the friend I was getting is also wonderful in her own way.

Then we took off to the Wegmans plaza where we split up for food. (Some creepers decided that Taco Bell was worthier of their money than Wegmans.) So Steve, Sarah, another friend whose name I can never remember because I'm a dunce, and I went to Wegmans. There, Tiff's mom was seen (and thus my day made). I ate a sandwich ridiculously quickly and finished my entire supply of water for the day.

Then currently-nameless-friend had to go home and Sarah showed up with our Lunch of Champions (because she is awesome and she for some reason felt it fit to share her food with creepy, hungry people).

I bought super chocolatey, brownie-like cookies as well. Contributions were well received.

Then we traveled to a bakery across the street where most of the others got sugar. (Sugar is the secret to life.)

Then we stopped in the Dollar Tree and Sarah got glow sticks. Which reminded me of the Hectic Glow Band. Alas, I doubt you've heard of them.

Then we headed off to one of the many forests in the park. (They all have paths and are fun to explore.) The one in which bags were stored was dubbed Narnia. Here I split off from the rest of the pack because I felt like hiding and watching them like the creep that I am. Eventually, they entered a forest that I had never explored before and I felt that I should follow them or risk being hopelessly severed.

Unfortunately (but not really, because it was spectacular), I followed the wrong path and ended up on the other side of the forest they entered. There I found a wondrous stone path with fantastic foliage that I had never known existed. I also found, peeking through the foliage, that it runs along the street on which my father works:
























I loved it there very much. It was spectacular.

Alas, my friends soon wondered where I was. I sent Steve a picture, but it didn't seem to help much. Apparently, I was the first to discover this place.

So, Steve called me, which I appreciated because it gave me a chance to use my speaker-phone. (Which was fun!)  Eventually we emerged on two different sides of a field of what I think is hay. We shouted to each other and then realized that we were still on our phones with each other.

I then proceeded to show my friends the magical path I had found. After which we retired to Narnia and I stole Horatio (Sarah's beautiful camera) for a while. At least, until she wanted to take pictures of people surrounded by colorful smoke from fancy things she bought at the flea market. At this point Steve and I became slave labor (releasing the smoke, blocking the wind with a sheet, fanning the smoke, et cetera). Although, I was relieved of labor when she requested I submit to the wills of her and Horatio as well and be captured on film.

After this I had to walk Katherine home. Which I did, and we talked about similarly awesome stuff. When i returned only Steve and Sarah remained. . . And I really want to start referring to them as the "S" crew.

We didn't stay in Narnia long. We explored more. (Although we first when to the park's building where there were bathrooms and a water fountain. And then to Rite Aid where I got a Gatorade I managed to drink in under three minutes and they got caffeinated drinks.)

Next to the hay field is another field that leads to a little lake, where Steve taught us (well, taught Sarah and tried to teach me) how to skip rocks. We followed the edge of this to the connecting park before deciding to go inside another bit of woods we had yet to explore. There we found what looked like a graffitied and abandoned train car. Sarah drew the Deathly Hallows symbol. Steve wrote DFTBA above it. Sarah took a picture of Steve and me making the Nerdfighter gang side on either side of it. Then we went back to exploring the water.

We followed a trail of cattails until we forced our way through some shrubbery and found ourselves at the entrance to the stone path again. So, of course, we walked along it again, until my dad called me. (Somehow, nearly eight hours had passed and my mom was worried.) So, we abandoned the beautiful path and had some fun in the field on the way to our abandoned bags.

Then, sadly, I had to leave my friends, who are spectacular.

On the way home a creeper hit on me. It was gross.

Hope your day was equally wonderful,
M. D. Koch

If you feel the need to alarm an eighteen year old girl by making her think she hit you with a moving vehicle, you are quite possibly an ass hole.

If you feel the need to play with your daughter's friend's hair after being repeatedly told not to do so, you may be an idiot.

If you ask to eat my food and use my bathroom, but do not wait for me to go there myself before taking off, you may cause annoyance.

If you think that seeing Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part two isn't worth it, you are a poor, lost soul.

I am not a poor, lost soul. I'm going to the movie theater tomorrow morning. Although, my attendance is not necessary. I know how it ends:

I show up and Voldemort hides in a corner. Harry Potter picks up the Elder wand, but I'm the new big cheese. When faced with the Elder want in battle it emits a high-pitched screech and burrows into the earth. As a lovely lady said, "Harry Potter didn't snap it, it snapped when it heard you coming."

Happy Independence Day!

I hear the fourth of July is a day to celebrate the United States' sovereignty. Well, that's all well and good. I'll hardly not support because, as fantastic as England is, there is no guarantee that had they not lost that battle I wouldn't be living in some kind of horror.


Alas, today I'm celebrating many other things. And all of them seem to be related to books.


First, there is the joy of a newly organized bookshelf. And, if I may say so, the most entertaining and spectacular of all the ways it has been organized. (I kid you not, it is beautiful. To prove my point--and to just take pictures of its awesomeness--I shall provide close-ups.)










First, there is a pedestal of alluring, leather-bound reference books for my silver coated Snapple bottle.
Oh, AP Chem. Oh, Tollens' test. How I love these things.

Second is my mad scientist blocks from ThinkGeek.
A robot, peasants with pitchforks, maniacal, a virus, and Potassium. Is that not beautiful?






Third is a snow globe. Although I'm hesitant to call it a snow globe when it has no fake snow and houses a bunny. . . Alas, who am I to judge?
I have a thing for snow globes.

Fourth is a Beijing Olympic Mascot that my best friend got me during her visit to China. It stands vigilant, as it rightfully deserves, on a pedestal of Yotsuba&!
Never question its power.








And, lastly, since I lack a fancy enough slinky, my squishy little green ball sits at the top of a flight of stairs. Book stairs.






Alas, while my sister and I were organizing this masterpiece, we realized that my bookmarks were not sitting on the second shelf, where they belong. This was bad, and it sent us into a frenzied search of the house, including going through every book we'd just carefully placed on the bookshelf if I had read it in the past month.

This may seem a bit out of proportion, but my bookmarks are actually more important to me than the combined worth of every book I own.

My best friend made them for me for two separate birthdays, and they are the only bookmarks that I've ever used since receiving the first one (which is on the right of the picture). I probably give them far too much importance, but they weren't something I requested. They were something my best friend wanted to make, and they illustrate two very important bits of my life.

Five days ago we managed to find the banana one fairly quickly, but the other remained illusive. I began to worry that I had stupidly left it in a library book that I had already returned, and I would be lying if I said that my sister and I didn't sulk for the rest of the day.

But, so sweet is Independence Day that is brings luck and, not even looking, I found the other bookmark.

The last book related thing that I am enjoying at the moment is a competition with my friend Taylor, who has read more classics than I have and mocks me for it. It has been decided that I should beat her, and she full-heartedly agrees. So I now spam her with every book I'm reading, though she seems to read just as quickly and retaliates.

Thus far I have finished:
God Bless You, Dr. Kevorkian
God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater
A Man Without a Country
The Martian Chronicles
Gulliver's Travels
Zero
The Croquet Player
Treasure Island
Yotsuba&! (Finally got the last four volumes)

. . . Yeah, I might be having a hard time focusing on classics.

Some weren't fantastic. Gulliver's Travels was a disappointment. But, all in all, I've given her positive reviews.

Care to join the competition?

Yttrium Einsteinium!

 

I know, it's a terrible picture.

In my defense, I only have a camera on my phone.

And I was being rushed.

And, come on, that's pretty far above my head with small symbols.

All the same, is that not the greatest clock you've ever seen?

(Fluorine Uranium Carbon Potassium, Yttrium Einsteinium!)

. . . All these pictures remind me of my promise to do writing exercises.

I know, I really ought to write more again.

I'll work on that. . .